Today's
Sale Make An Offer!
Meet The Patients! Great
Things I've been Offered! Advice
About Me
MEET THE PATIENTS!
Name: J.F. Dunugun
Room: #215
Date of Admission: January 12 1997
Birthplace: Redstone, Arkansas
Age: 47
Turn-on's: Flying
Turn-off's: Large Cats
Habits: Early Morning Crowing. Roof Jumping.
Favorite Quote: "Cock-a-doddle-doo"!!!! (often
repeated endlessly)
Personal Notes: In the 3 years since J.F.Dunugun
was admitted to the institution, he's certainly made quite a name for himself!
His trademark "Crowing" can be heard throughout the Institution every
morning as he greets the dawn in his own unique style. This former Math
Teacher made quite a name for himself last November when,
in an attempt to "fly south" for the winter, he leapt off the Institutes
rooftop.
Fortunately he landed upon the roof of Nurse Grady's Station Wagon,
and only suffered 24 major broken bones.
Currently High Bidder on The Brooklyn Bridge!
Send a message to J.F. Dunugun Here
Name: H.T. Smith
Room: #211
Date of Admission: April 12 1993
Birthplace: Bentyne, Utah
Age: 56
Turn-on's: Mind Reading and
Wooden Necklaces of all shapes and colors!
Turn-off's: People who wear Tin Foil "Thought-Protectors"!!!!
Favorite Saying: "Stop Thinking so loudly you
dirty bastard!!"
Personal Notes: H.T. Smith
claims to have once read the mind of a very famous business man. Using
the information he gathered from this man's brain, he himself became rich.
After suffering a "little breakdown", Mr.
Smith invested all his money in wooden necklaces, many of which he still
wears to this day!
Currently High Bidder on Rome!
Send a message to H.T. Smith Here
Name: Robert L. Letzova
Room: #341
Date of Admission: June 22 1978
Birthplace: Budapest, Hungary
Age: 63
Personal Notes: This is the patient whose room I was exploring when I discovered that unknown object that smells like a Monkey!!! Perhaps after I sell it, I will ask him what it was! Truly a mystical man!
Send a message to J.F. Dunugun Here (Please don't mention this sale to him though!)
Name: R.Y. Porter Room
#412b
Room: #412b
Date of Admission: May 14 1999
Birthplace: New York, New York
Age: 24
Turn-on's: Showing people my butt
Hobbies: Photographing my butt
Favorite Saying: "Hey Mister! Say hello to my
Butt!!!"
Personal Notes: Though she hasn't been at the
Institute very long, we've all gotten to know a "certain side" of
Rebecca.Y. Porter very very well indeed!!
Currently High Bidder on "Smells Like a Monkey! Smells like a Monkey!"
Send a message to R.Y. Porter Here
Name: T.W. Greene
Room: #511
Date of Admission: September 18 1988
Birthplace: Geneva, Switzerland
Age: 32
Turn-on's: Protecting his thoughts, and the thoughts
of others
Turn-off's: Thought Reading Televisions and Radios
Favorite Saying: "ee-ee-ee-ow!!!!"
Personal Notes: I've know Mr. Ted W. Greene for
a long time now, and consider him to be a very close friend.
In all that time, he has never once allowed my thoughts to be read
by another!
His offers of "thought protection" never go unappreciated, even
when he repetitively makes these offers as frequently as once every 4 seconds!
He is pictured above with one of his very first Thought Protectors!
Currently High Bidder on The Cherry Cough Drop! (Which is no longer where I left it!!!!! Hmmm!)
Send a message to T.W. Greene Here
Copyright Jan.25 2000